pastorjfreeman

Here we are again, another Christmas Eve and Christmas Day approaching. This will be our second Christmas without Trey. I had thought it might be easier this time around, but I was wrong. It is just as difficult today as it was this time last year…BUT, we continue to press on with the grace and strength God provides.

I was talking with some of my family today and found myself reflecting on how much has changed in our lives these past two years. It truly is hard to even put into words all that we have been through. This year is a little different though. Our family has had two new additions that we never foresaw coming…especially coming at the same time. Both additions have been a blessing though and it is with joy that I tell you about them.

The first addition was a new puppy. Our kids have wanted a dog for as long as I can remember and have begged us for years to get one. Emily and I finally broke down and surprised our kids with a 6 week old white English lab about 4 weeks ago. Our kids were shocked. We named the dog Brecken because of our fondness of Colorado and annual summer trips to Breckenridge. Brecken has been a handful to say the least. She is such a bundle of energy.

However, about a week ago, Emily and I got a call from DHS letting us know about an opportunity to foster a four month old little boy named Phillip. They asked if we were interested. Emily and I said, “Of course,” but needed to pray about it for a few days. The timing was not great for several reasons, but one reason was due to our new puppy. Anyone who has had a new puppy, especially a lab, knows how hard the first year of training is. Emily and I were not sure we would be able to keep the dog and take in an infant. So…we had some decisions to make.

To make a long story short, we sat down with our children and we made a family decision…if we were going to take Phillip, we needed to find another home for Brecken. Well, in the midst of all this, my brother in law and sister in law had begun thinking about “adopting” Brecken from us. As many of you know, they, as well as their children, have been through a lot too, and they thought the addition of a dog might be good for their family. So, they decided to take in Brecken and keep her in the family. This was great news for us because it allows us to still be a part of Brecken’s life since they only live about a mile down the road from us. I will say that when they came to get Brecken from us that I cried like a baby for about 3 hours. I can’t believe how much I bonded with her and how close we got in such a short time. I plan to be her favorite uncle…and I’ve gone to see her everyday I might add :-). I will forever be grateful to Ben and Jeannie for taking Brecken in as their own and keeping her close to us.

So, today, Christmas Eve, Emily and I, and our children, went to pick up Phillip. Our plan is to foster him with the hope of adopting him as soon as possible. We have prayed about this very much and we all believe that Phillip is to be the next Freeman. He is so cute and sweet and we cannot wait for everyone to meet him. We are not allowed to post pictures of him online, but I can tell you that he is a beautiful baby boy and has already blessed us so much…and we haven’t even had him for 24 hours. Please pray for us as we seek God’s will for his life and our’s.

So…needless to say, this will be a special Christmas. Oh how I miss Trey, and how my heart hurts so much all the time without him, but it is because of him that God opened our hearts to adoption. So…in many ways, Trey is right here with us. We could never replace Trey and would never try, but I am grateful God continues to use him to make an eternal difference in people’s lives. Phillip’s life will forever be changed because God used our son, Trey, to change our lives. We love you Trey and we can’t wait to see you soon.

Any way, pray for us. Tomorrow, Christmas morning, will be special, but difficult. It will be filled with a mixture of joy and sorrow, laughter and pain. But…in it all, our God is faithful and continues to see us through. I will leave you with these words:

“Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us (Romans‬ ‭5‬:‭1-5‬).”

Amen and amen!!! Jesus is HOPE!!! Merry Christmas everyone.

On this day last year (11/12/13), God moved in my heart and spoke very clearly to me about the kind of leader I was and needed to be. I wrote a blog about it later that week, which I have re-posted below.

I have been reflecting on all that God has done this year though, and I praise Him for His faithfulness to me and my family. It’s hard to be a grieving leader, but as A.W. Tower has said, “Before God can use you mightily, He has to wound you deeply.” Well, I have been wounded and now I pray God continues to use me for His glory…however He sees fit. Here was my post from last year:

Tuesday’s date was 11/12/13…an unique date for sure. It was a date some people found interesting or perhaps didn’t even notice, and a date many will probably forget. For me, 11/12/13 took on a new meaning though. For me 11/12/13 is a date I won’t forget. I won’t forget it, not because of its unique sequence, but rather because of some things God spoke to my heart.

It’s been a little over 2 months since Trey went to be with the Lord. Things have not gotten easier or harder…things have just changed. Emily and I and our children are learning to live with a broken heart. We are all trying to figure out the new normal. I know some people think I’m healing nicely, and I’m sure there are others who think I should heal faster, but the Lord is healing us in His time. Emily and I know things will never be the same, but we know that God will keep strengthening us and helping us move forward.

Our faith has never been stronger!!! I say it again, our faith is strong. Yes, we have wrestled with living what we know to be true at times, and getting the mind and the heart on the same page can be a challenge, but all in all, I think we are doing as well as can be expected. God continues to show Himself faithful to us and teach us what it means to truly trust Him. We are learning to trust Him deeply with our pain.

I have had some difficult, but meaningful conversations this week though. What’s interesting is that as a result of some of the conversations I have had, God really began moving in my heart. It’s hard to describe, but Tuesday was a turning point for me…a turning point that is difficult to even describe. I’m just learning daily how to live through the pain. One thing I’m realizing is that it is hard having a broken heart, but still having to be a spiritual leader. It’s hard to help people with their grief, when I still have a mountain of my own to deal with…but God has called and equipped me to pastor and shepherd people, and He is showing and teaching me how to do this more faithfully. I’m very grateful for God’s overwhelming, carrying grace. He reminded me this week that I am in the palm of His hand and He will see me through. I’m just discovering that God often uses hard things to speak to and change me…and I guess in a strange way, I am even learning to appreciate the hard things.

The challenge for me will be balancing it all…balancing my emotions; attitude; responses; thoughts; goals; desires; etc. I have to lead my wife…my children…my extended family…the church God has called me to…and on and on. The only way I will be able to do that effectively is by letting the Lord lead me. I know He is walking me! I know that all I really have to do is please Him! I know that no matter what, He is in control and He will provide all I need, in order for me to be who I need to be.

So…He spoke all that into my heart this Tuesday…that and much more. I needed it. I needed to be reminded that while others don’t know my heart, He does. He is walking with me. He is so good and so faithful. He understand my pain. He weeps and rejoices with me. He truly is the shepherd of MY soul. As the Psalmist said, “I love you oh Lord my strength!” And boy do I love the Lord.

One final thing…when Trey breathed his last breath and stepped into eternity with His Savior, I thought I was somewhat prepared for that. Emily and I had talked about the reality and possibility of his death many times. We talked to our kids about it. We wanted no one blind-sided. Well, all I can tell you is this: NOTHING, absolutely nothing can prepare you for such an event. Watching your precious child breathe their final breaths, even with the hope of heaven in your heart, may be the most heart wrenching experience in the world. While those moments shook our family to the core, what we have discovered is that God is everything He says He is and provides everything He said He would provide. He was with us in those moments…and most importantly, He was with Trey and carried Trey safely into His arms. Emily and I have been weak at times, and perhaps that is all you have seen of us…but in those moments of weakness, GOD HAS BEEN STRONG!!! When we struggle to breathe, He breathes for us. When we don’t want to get up, He lifts our head. When pressure and stress rises, He gives peace. So, we may not have handled everything perfectly…in fact, I know we haven’t, but I know this, in the midst of our darkest hours, our God has been 100% faithful to us. He has been perfect, because He is perfect. He has been patient with us and carried us along…and He will see us ALL THE WAY HOME!

We hope our journey has been nothing but an encouragement to you. We have tried to be real and honest and always point to the Lord. As I said though, I know we’ve messed up at times along the way, and if our journey and the way we have handled our journey has caused you to stumble in any way, I am sorry. We have only always ever wanted to point to Jesus through this journey…and I pray we have.

Keep praying for our family. We are healing. We are learning and adjusting to the new normal. And most importantly, we are experiencing a closeness to the Lord and each other like never before.

“The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble, and He knows those who trust in Him.” -Nahum 1:7

I used to absolutely love this time of the year. From October to January, I have always loved everything about the fall and winter seasons. That has all changed now. Everything has changed. It is not that I go around moping or sad all the time, it is just not the same without Trey. In all that we do as a family, there is just always something missing. Behind our smiles, there is always some level of pain, and in our laughter, there is always some heartache. It is just life as we know it and we are still having to learn how to adjust to the new normal every single day.

We recently had our Fall Festival at the church. Trey loved dressing up for our church’s annual festival. This year was particularly hard. We saw many of Trey’s friends dressed up in their costumes and playing the games, and Emily and I could not help but wonder what Trey would be wearing and doing. We are also currently signing kids up for our Upward Basketball program. Trey desperately wanted to play Upward and for me to be his coach. He was so looking forward to that. I also recently baptized two of Trey’s friends, one of which was a little girl Trey had a crush on. I will never forget him telling me about his crush on this sweet little girl in the hospital. And of course, Thanksgiving and Christmas are all approaching as well. I do not know of another child who loved Christmas more than Trey. So, it is just hard all the way around…for all of us.

I know that Trey is not missing out on anything. He lacks nothing in the presence of God. I also know that when we see him again, it will be as if we were never apart. But, the in between phase is what is so hard. Truly, everything has changed so much, and our struggle remains. Those who have experienced loss know what I am talking about too. I think of several of our dear friends going through exactly what we are. I think of other friends getting ready to face what we are going through. This fallen world is just so hard, and with every heartache, it makes me long for the New Heaven and the New Earth.

Today, I am reminded of two things: 1.) Life in a fallen world is not pleasant! The Bible says that this world is not our home and that Christians are “aliens and strangers” in it. The pains and heartaches of this world are to serve as reminders that we are made for eternity. For those of us who are in Christ, this is good news…GREAT NEWS! One day, we will be with the Lord forever and forever. So today, if you are a Christian and you are suffering…just remember, this fallen world does not have the final say…God does, and the best is yet to come. I heard someone say it like this one time: “For the Christian, this world is as bad as it will ever get, but for the non-Christian, this world is as good it will ever get;” 2.) In the fallen world, God has promised to be with us! I love that one of God’s promises for His children is to never leave or forsake them. Today, if you are hurting like me, just know that you are not alone…God is with you!  We simply must look to Him and ask Him to carry our burdens. There are times I feel like no one understands my pain, my fears, my hurts, but then I am reminded that Jesus does. Jesus knows rejection, suffering, and pain in the greatest of all ways, and the BIble says that He weeps with us. God had the effects of sin more than we do, and when He sees His children suffer or hurt, He grieves. One day though, He will make it all right and restore all things in the final New Heaven and New Earth (Revelation 21). I, for one, cannot wait for that day.

Let me end with one final thing. The other day, a man walked up to me and said, “I hear you and Emily are really struggling.” I said, “No more than usual, but we are making it by the grace of God every day.” My answer was obviously not what he was looking for because he proceeded to tell me why I should not be struggling. I listened and really did not try to correct him because I have just learned with some, there is really no point. I did say, “Brother, I appreciate your concern, but as long as we are on this earth, we will have hurts and pains. As long as Emily and I are alive, we will grieve the loss of our son. But, we grieve with hope. We weep with trust in our Savior. We will get up each day and continue to get up each day and trust God with our pain. So, we will probably keep struggling, but as the Apostle Paul said, ‘We have been struck down, but not destroyed.'”

I think some Christians feel like people who struggle are somehow not walking with the Lord as they should, or that there is a deficiency in their faith.  I actually feel the opposite. The Bible teachers that “in our weakness, HE is strong.” Yes, Emily and I and our family continue to struggle, and we are okay with that. Yes, we have good days…yes, we are making new memories…yes, we are continuing to move forward, but we are still struggling…and for us, that is okay. The struggle makes us depend on the Lord. The struggle keeps us focused on eternity. The struggle reminds us God is in control and is our only source of true joy. The struggle is real, but it is okay…and because God is God and He is good, we will be okay.

Keep praying for us as you think about us…pray we keep making much of Jesus in our struggle!

I did it!  I completed the Chicago Marathon.  My goal was to do it in less than 5 hours and my official time was 4 hours and 28 minutes.  It was a great run, on a great day, in a great city, with great weather, running for a great cause!  I will never forget the experience.

The official length of a marathon is 26.2 miles. So often, when people talk about marathons, they will say it is 26 miles.  I always correct them and say, “No, it is 26.2 miles.”  If you have never run long distances, you might think there is little difference between 26 and 26.2 miles, but for those who do run, the .2 makes a big difference. In fact, the .2 is over 350 yards (the length of over three football fields). So, no matter how insignificant .2 miles may seem, it is vital in order to complete the marathon.  If you stop running after 26 miles, you fail to finish, and all those other miles are meaningless.

As I have reflected on the marathon, one thing that struck me was that sometimes when you think you are finished, you realize you still have .2 to go, and as I said, in order to be considered an official finisher of the marathon, you have to complete the .2!  As I passed the 26 mile sign during my marathon, I found myself asking, “How silly and foolish would it be if I just stopped right now?”  I was tired, hurting, and ready to be finished, but I knew that in order to complete the marathon, I had to go the final .2.  The reality is, the .2 matters and a marathon runner cannot forget that.

In life, the .2 matters as well.  So often we find ourselves running the “race of life,” and think there is no way we will be able to keep going.  We get tired, frustrated, and ready to quit, when in reality, there is only .2 more to go, so to speak.  Just as it would have been foolish for me to quit with only .2 left, it is foolish not to finish the “race of life” you are running.  We cannot forget the .2 and that the .2 really does matter.

Wherever you are in life today, remember this, you can make it and you will make it!  The Bible says in Philippians 4:13 that we can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us.  Truly, in the strength God provides, you can endure anything.  He will give you what you need for the WHOLE race, even the final .2.  If you are ready to quit today, don’t!  If you feel like you cannot go on, look to the Lord.  As you run your race, the .2 can look overwhelming, but remember, when you finish, you will be glad you kept running.  Let me leave you with one final passage of Scripture:  “…the time for my departure is near. ⁷ I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.⁸ Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day… (2 Timothy 4:6-8).” In other words, keep running and finish well. Don’t forget the .2!  See you next week.

Jeremy Freeman

www.pastorjfreeman.com

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I am running the Chicago Marathon tomorrow morning! The date is 10/12/14. When I think back to all that has happened in my life these past 2 years, it truly is hard to even believe I am still standing…but, by the grace of God, I am what I am. I have learned and continue to learn that in my weakness, He is strong.

Anyone who knows me, knows I am running tomorrow for a Pediatric Cancer Research Organization in honor of my son, Trey! Tomorrow is a special day because it is so personal to me. Tomorrow is way more than a run and way more than an event on my calendar. Tomorrow is another step in my journey of healing and another opportunity to keep pointing people to Christ through Trey’s story. I will be wearing my “Run for Trey” shirt, and I will be running as hard as I can, competing, I pray, with just a fraction of the endurance and strength Trey exhibited in his life!

It is hard to put into words the mixture of emotions I feel everyday, and it is impossible to put into words how much I miss my son. I do not know if he will be able to see me tomorrow, but I know this, he will be at the front of my mind. I will see his handsome face, his beautiful smile, his contagious laugh, his courageous spirit, and so much more. I will envision him waiting for me at the finish line, and I will imagine what it will feel like to wrap my arms around his neck and pick him up and hug him…and all of it will be a reminder that we will one day be reunited in the presence of our Savior, Jesus Christ!

Any way, for everyone who is and has been with me in this journey, thank you. I have such tremendous family and friends…and I love you all!

So…here is to tomorrow…here is to a great race…here is to another step in the journey! I love you Trey, and tomorrow, I run for you buddy! I will see you soon!

I will leave you with a Scripture my oldest daughter sent me…one that is fitting for tomorrow:

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with endurance the race marked out for us, with our eyes fixed on Jesus the author and perfecter of faith.”

Setting the Pace:Living Life with an Eternal Perspective

I am running the Chicago Marathon on October 12th. This will be 26.2 miles of pure work. I have run one marathon before, but I am not a typical “marathon runner,” nor do I desire to become one. I plan to run this marathon and the Oklahoma City marathon next Spring, and then my marathon days are done. I will stick with shorter runs in the future. You might wonder why I am running this marathon. I can tell you, I am running with a specific purpose in mind.

As I mentioned in my first article, my seven year old son, Trey, had a long battle with cancer in 2012-2013. During that year, he spent over 280 days in the hospital. On September 1, 2013, the Lord called him home to heaven. Trey fought cancer hard though. He had the heart of a warrior and he never quit. In fact, it was because of his enduring spirit that he earned the nickname “Super Trey.”

As a parent, it was incredibly hard watching my son battle. I felt so helpless at times and every day, I desperately wanted to take his place. But, I couldn’t. It was hard to come to grips with this, but Trey’s “race” and my “race” were different. He had to endure intense cancer and now I have to endure living with intense emotional pain. What I want to do is endure the way Trey endured. I want to live, “run my race,” with just a fraction of the strength he displayed.

The marathon I am running in Chicago is in Trey’s honor. God used my son to absolutely change my life. He was and forever will be my hero, and I want to run for him. I am also running for a pediatric cancer research organization that raises funds to help find cures for such a horrible disease that affects so many children. I have worked and trained hard, and hope that I will start the race well and finish the race well. I do not know if Trey will be able to see me run or not, but I know this, as I run, I will see him. I will remember him. I will remember his smile, his laugh, his heart, his endurance, his strength, and so much more. When I want to quit, I’ll think of him and when I see that finish line, I will imagine him waiting on me. As you can see, I am running this race with a specific purpose in mind.

What is your “race”? Are you running it with a specific purpose? Maybe your race involves battling a disease, living with emotional pain of some sort, or another life struggle. Perhaps you are still searching for the “finish line”. Whatever your race is, run it and run it well. Ultimately, we are to run our race for the Lord and run with the strength He provides. Hebrews 12:1-2 says this, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us RUN with ENDURANCE the RACE that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith…”

Whatever your “race” is, run it for the Lord Jesus Christ! He is the One who loves you and gave His life for you. We should “run” for Him because He gave His all for us. Let us run well. See you next week!

Setting the Pace:Living Life with an Eternal Perspective

I had the privilege of being a part of a very special funeral service this past Monday for Paulene Harryman. Paulene went to be with the Lord at 101 years of age on September 18, 2014. From a human standpoint, she had lived a long life. I had the unique privilege of being her pastor and seeing the far-reaching impact of her life. She was very special to me and will forever hold a special place in my heart.

Paulene moved to Newcastle when she was eight years old, and lived the rest of her earthly life here. Her husband Vencil, who went to be with the Lord in 1983, was Newcastle’s first mayor and instrumental in helping move Newcastle forward in its early days.   Both she and Vencil loved this community, their church, but most importantly their Lord.

As I reflected on Paulene’s life, I found myself at a loss for words, something most preachers don’t struggle with, I might add. I found myself thinking, no matter what I say about her, it will pale in comparison to the person she truly was. Paulene was perhaps one of THE most genuine Christians I have ever known. She did not just talk about her faith, she lived it. But what did she live? What made her so special? There were two things that came to the front of my mind: (1) She had a real relationship with God through His Son Jesus Christ. She was saved at the age of twelve in the winter of 1925, and was baptized in a pond in Newcastle in the spring of 1926. She wanted to make sure I, and everyone, knew that her Savior had changed her; (2) She lived with the end in mind. In other words, she had an eternal perspective.   She made decisions with the end in mind. She did not live for temporary pleasure. She did not focus on fleeting things. Her heart and mind were focused on things that truly mattered, on eternal things.

This led to me to once again reflect on my own life and ask some questions. What consumes my heart and mind? What will my life say when people gather at my funeral? What is most important to me? Paulene’s life reminded me to live with the end in mind, because when we live this way, we will have an impact that will reach farther than we could have ever imagined. Think about it, what if we all lived with the end in mind today? A perspective like that would lead us to do differently.

During my funeral messages, I’ve always said this, “I don’t really preach anyone’s funeral. The life they lived and the decisions they made will speak long and loud after they are gone.” Paulene’s life has spoken, and it has spoken well. She lived for what mattered most and the impact of her life continues. What will your life say? What will mine say? Let’s live with the end in mind. See you next week!

Jeremy Freeman

www.pastorjfreeman.com

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Setting the Pace: Living Life with an Eternal Perspective

Welcome to my new column! I look forward to sharing a few thoughts and encouragements with you each and every week. As you can see, I have titled this column, Setting the Pace, and have added the tag line, Living Life with an Eternal Perspective. The reason I selected this title is because I believe the only way to “set the pace” in our short, temporary life, is by living life with an eternal perspective, and it is with that perspective I will be writing each week.

My family has learned much about living with an eternal perspective the past two years. Many of you might remember hearing and reading about my son, Trey, in the Newcastle Pacer. Our son was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer in 2012, and fought hard every single day for a year, but on September 1, 2013, the Lord called him home to heaven. Trey was 7 years old. As you can imagine, this was incredibly difficult for our family. My wife and I have four other children, and we were all shaken to our very core. Yes, I am a pastor, and yes, I know what the Bible says, but there is a difference between “knowing” something and “living” something, and on September 1, 2013, we were confronted with the reality of whether or not we would truly live what we knew. On that day, we were greatly comforted with the incredible truth that Trey was in the presence of God, because he had surrendered his life to Jesus earlier that year. However, we were still hurting since we knew we had to go on in this life without him. That was and continues to be a difficult reality.

Since September 1, 2013, my family has been on a journey together, though it is a journey of growth and healing. We have learned, in a fresh and new way, what it means to make the most of the time God has given us. The Bible says in James 4:14, “What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.” This verse begs the question, “How should we live our lives while on this earth?” Some might say, “Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we shall die.” Others might read that verse and live in fear, or go into a hyper-protective mode trying not to ever let anything bad happen to them or the ones they love. Yet, those perspectives and many more are not the way we need to live.

2 Corinthians 4:18 tell us what to do. This scripture says, “So we fix our eyes, NOT on what we can see, but on what we CANNOT see, for what is seen is temporary, and what is unseen is eternal.” This is how we need to live. We need to live on earth with a focus on eternity. When we live with eternity in mind, we will live to please God, whom we will all stand before one day. We will love and treat our family and friends they way they should be treated. We will have the right priorities and make better decisions. We will serve and sacrifice for others instead of living for ourselves. We will not worry about things that do not matter or things we cannot control. And list goes on and on. Today, live with an eternal perspective, and watch how it changes everything else in your life. See you next week!

Jeremy Freeman

www.pastorjfreeman.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jeremy.freeman.3538

Twitter: JeremyFreeman_

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Being in Tulsa was fun today. Caleb and I love watching the Sooners. But…it was also very hard. Tulsa is where everything began for Trey. We have so many memories of Trey there and it was just emotional being back. I like to think of “T Town” as “Trey Town.” Any way, when I feel discouraged, I always listen to the song below. Read the words below. I pray they encourage you as they did me:

“The Glorious Unfolding”

Lay your head down tonight
Take a rest from the fight
Don’t try to figure it out
Just listen to what I’m whispering to your heart
‘Cause I know this is not
Anything like you thought
The story of your life was gonna be
And it feels like the end has started closing in on you
But it’s just not true
There’s so much of the story that’s still yet to unfold

And this is going to be a glorious unfolding
Just you wait and see and you will be amazed
You’ve just got to believe the story is so far from over
So hold on to every promise God has made to us
And watch this glorious unfolding

God’s plan from the start
For this world and your heart
Has been to show His glory and His grace
Forever revealing the depth and the beauty of
His unfailing Love
And the story has only begun

And this is going to be a glorious unfolding
Just you wait and see and you will be amazed
We’ve just got to believe the story is so far from over
So hold on to every promise God has made to us
And watch this glorious unfolding

We were made to run through fields of forever
Singing songs to our Savior and King
So let us remember this life we’re living
Is just the beginning of the beginning

Of this glorious unfolding
We will watch and see and we will be amazed
If we just keep on believing the story is so far from over
And hold on to every promise God has made to us
We’ll see the glorious unfolding

It’s 11:55pm on September 1, 2014, and in 5 minutes, it will be a new day…and specifically for our family, the start of another year.

Trey went to be with Jesus at 12:00pm on September 1, 2013. I remember driving home from the hospital in Dallas that day with all of our family in the car, except Trey. His spot in the car was empty, and the spot he left in our hearts made us feel even emptier! Our family was in shock. We had come home from Dallas so many times, but this time was so incredibly different. Trey and I had made countless trips to Dallas together over the years, and now he was gone…just like that…gone. There are so many days I still just can’t believe he is not here. It’s the strangest feeling to have and so very difficult to live with the emptiness his absence leaves in our hearts.

The last year for us has been filled with many ups and downs…blessings and challenges. We have had to keep going…one step and one breath at a time. This is a place our family has never been in before, so we are all learning how to “re-live.” This is not how Emily and I saw our lives going…we did not ask for this…our kids did not ask for this…but it is here, it is reality, and it is sink or swim. So…we’ve been swimming this year so to speak, even though at times we have all felt like we were drowning. But, by the sheer grace and mercy of God, we have and continue to persevere. We have also had so many people come along and encourage us, support us, pray for us, love on us, and minIster to us! We could never say thank you enough to all the wonderful people who have and continue to help us in our journey. We love you all so much!

The most rewarding part of this year has been seeing the far reaching impact of Trey’s life and testimony. This is no exaggeration, but thousands of people have come to know Christ because of God’s redeeming work in Trey. So many people have made Jesus the “Boss” of their life, just like Trey did on January 8, 2013. His story has been shared in numerous cities, states, and countries…and people’s lives continued to be impacted by a simple 7 year old boy. Every time we hear that someone was saved, or encouraged, or changed because of Trey, it brings tremendous joy to our hearts. We have all simply been reminded of the importance of living with an eternal perspective, and we are so grateful that eternity continues to be impacted because of Trey’s relationship with his Savior, Jesus Christ.

God was very good to our family today. In fact, I woke up after having a very nice dream about Trey. In the past year, I have only had a couple of dreams about Trey, so it was extremely nice to dream about him. In my dream, I was watching him swim and as he jumped into the pool, I swam over to him to make sure he was okay. When he came up out of the water, he initially pushed me away, but once he realized it was me, he smiled, hugged me, and held on to me. I woke up with tears in my eyes and a smile on my face. As Trey would say, they were “happy tears.” I long to hold him and hug him again. He was always my best snuggler and I simply can’t wait to wrap my arms around his neck again in the New Heaven and New Earth!

Today, we also made pancakes for breakfast in Trey’s honor (his favorite by the way), watched home videos,
did some swimming (something he loved to do), went to the graveside, and ate at one of Trey’s favorite places tonight. It was a hard, but good day. I was grateful today was a holiday and that the whole family got to be together. There were many other blessings throughout this day as well, and we were thankful for each one.

As I get ready to head to bed tonight, I would just say two quick things:
1. Make sure you know Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you want to know how you can know Him, please contact me; and
2. While you are on this earth, live for eternal things! My life verse is 2 Corinthians 4:18 which says, “So we fix our eyes, not on what we can see, but what we cannot see, for what is seen is temporary and want is unseen is eternal.” May we all keep living for the unseen things…the eternal things.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. We love each of you and we so appreciate your prayers. I will keep writing the things God puts on my heart and sharing Trey’s story until Jesus comes back or takes me home!

And BECAUSE JESUS LIVES, WE CAN AND WILL FACE TOMORROW!!! As the song says, “Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow!”

We love you Trey! You are forever our hero and remain in the deepest part of our hearts. Thank you for bringing such joy to our lives. You were an incredible son and your daddy loves you so much. I thank God every day for the 7 years I had with you. I didn’t deserve you, but I am so glad God gave you to me. I am a better person because of you. Thank you for impacting my life. I WILL SEE YOU SOON BUDDY!