Today, March 1st, marks 6 months since my son, my hero, Trey went to be with Jesus! It’s not any easier today that it was on September 1st…it’s different, but not easier.
We continue to live in a tension, between trying to go on normally, and yet never feeling normal in anything we do anymore. There are days the “normalcy” is overwhelming emotionally, physically, mentally, etc. As my wife aptly said to me the other day, “It’s exhausting trying to be normal.” Some will have no idea what that means, but some know exactly what I’m talking about. But…then there are days when the normalcy feels good. Where sitting at a ball game feels okay. Where sitting around the dinner table feels okay. It’s just such a balance and such a challenge every single day.
So…we press on in God’s strength. We try to make the most of our time on earth, yet yearning for eternity every day. We remember Trey in everything, yet try and keep moving for the sake of so many others…our kids, family, church family, community, and even ourselves. Breathing used to be so natural…so easy, but now, with our every breath, we depend on the Lord. As I have thought and said so many times these past 6 months, “Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow…”
We love our Trey-man! We miss our hero! I miss seeing his incredible personality…his one of a kind smile…his wonderful laugh…his voice…his touch…his heart for the Lord…his love for his brothers and sisters, and for his mom and dad…I miss watching him play with his toys and watching him play with his friends. I miss watching him play sports and ride his bike and swim and eat pancakes and play video games and jump on the trampoline. I miss watching him sleep. I miss holding him. I miss so many other things. BUT…I’m reminded always that Trey misses nothing!!! HE IS WITH THE LORD AND IN GOD’S PRESENCE THERE IS FULLNESS OF JOY…and because I know he’s happy and with the Lord, that gives me peace.
But, until then, for us, “Life is less sweet, death is less bitter, and heaven is more real.”
You dad loves you Trey and always will. When I run that 13.1 miles in April, every step will be for you. I love you son. You were a great son and I miss you so much everyday. Your forever in my heart. I will see you soon buddy.